Category Archives: memories and more

Amma

You: You will realize when you have a child of your own and she does this.

Me(all of seven): I will never force my child to do what I want to do. I will give her a chance to use her own brain and decide.

You: I am your mother, I know better. Just do what I say. It is for your own good.

Me: I don’t want to.

You: I don’t care if you want to or not, just do it.

Me: I just want to play, let me play.

You: You have played all day long, if you don’t finish your meal NOW you will get into trouble, BIG TROUBLE.

Sulking Me(In my head): When will I have the freedom to do what I want to do, not eat my meals and get away with it. I can’t wait to get out of here.

Mind Reader that you are : You will realize all this when you go away, have a family of your own and don’t have me around to fuss and fret over you. Now finish your food before Achan gets here.

Me(Crying and choking on my food): You don’t love me. What do you do for me? You are always yelling at me.

And this saga continued day after day way into my teens.  Wonder where you got all the patience and energy from?

Fast forward twenty something years –

Amma and K Your Grand daughter is roughly the same age as I was and we have been having this ongoing discussion for hours.

Here is the last part of it –

Me: Do what I’ve asked you to and then watch TV.

Your Grand-daughter: Amma, let me watch TV. I can’t do it now.

Me: Do as I say, I know what is good for you.

Your Grand daughter: No, I will do what I want to do.

Me: I am your Mother, I know what is best for you. Too much of TV is definitely not good for your intellect. Pick up your journal and start writing.

Your Grand-daughter: I DON’T want to write. I don’t like to write.

Me:  Remember what Ms. N said? You need to keep writing daily to improve your handwriting. In India it is important to have a good handwriting.

Your Grand-daughter: I don’t care. I don’t want a good handwriting.

Me: PICK UP YOUR JOURNAL, NOW!!!!!!

Your Feisty little Grand Daughter: I am NOT going to write. I have nothing to write about.

Me: Sit tight for ten minutes and you will come up with something. Think about our recent vacation at your grand parents place. Write about the Vela or all the mango trees in Ammamma’s house.

Your GD: I don’t want to write, I’m BORED of writing.

Me(Almost losing it): I DON’T CARE FOR YOUR BOREDOM. IF YOU DON’T PICK UP THE JOURNAL RIGHT NOW YOU ARE IN BIG BIG TROUBLE.

Your Grand daughter(with tears flowing down her chubby cheeks): You don’t love me, you don’t even like me. You bother me all the time.

 

Fast forward to the same evening –

Me(on the phone): I’m EXHAUSTED. Mothering your grand daughter is the most stressful job in the universe.

You: It’s ok, kids who are troublesome while they are little always turn out to be loving supportive children. You wait and see when she grows up she will be the best kid out there.

Me: She is so stubborn, she drives me up the wall. I mean, she cried for hours before touching her book. Have I EVER troubled you like this?

You: No way, you were such a good kid. You were NEVER stubborn. I am shocked your daughter is like this. Now your sister is a different story, I’m pretty sure she has taken after her aunt. You don’t worry. Soon she’ll grow up and understand.

Me: When is she going to grow up? I can’t wait.

You: Don’t hope for that. They grow up too soon as it is. Enjoy every minute of it for soon she is going to grow up and go away and then you better not have any expectations from her.

Me: *sigh* You are right!

How is it that you are always so right? 

I Love you even more after experiencing Motherhood. I don’t need Mother’s Day to remind me of the invaluable gift in my life called Amma. Not a single day goes by when I don’t think of you and everything you did to raise us. Even though we are not always on the same page, you are always in my heart.

Here is wishing you a Happy Mother’s Day in advance.

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Nemmara Vallangi Vela 2009

The Nemmara Vela 2009 is an unforgettable experience. Not only did I get to participate in the festivities, I also got to experience the fireworks, a first for me.

As usual the festivities began with all the pomp and vigour. On a positive note, neither was the heat index as high as last year nor did it rain. Excellent panchavadyam was music to every aching ear, heigtening each of my senses and transporting me to a greater world. If I could choose from my entire life, all the episodes where I have experienced heaven on earth, this panchavadyam is definitely going to be somewhere on top of that list.

As usual, Bhagavathi’s thidambu was beautiful, personifying her dignity and elegance. The “thidambu ketal” ceremony at Mannath Temple was great to watch. It gets better every time. The magnificient pachyderms stole the show, atleast from the point of view of the petite participants. All of them were awestruck by the eleven elephants at the Vetaikorumagan ksehtram.

Both the pandals were pieces of art. It seems bad that they are coming down as I type this but then if history is proof, the next ones will beat even these.

As a grand finale, the night sky errupted into hues of dazzling colours. My little one was more interested in knowing the winner of the fireworks display. I personally liked both, one for the accoustic effects and the other for the pyrotechnique display.

This Vela is a significant event in our calender and if you go by the sea of people thronging Nellikulangara Kaavu on the two days, it is understood that many hold the same sentiments.  I am inspired to create an entire writeup on the Vela after interviewing DH’s Ammamma. That is definitely in the agenda for a future post.

Note: Pictures and videos are definitely on the way, as soon as I get back to my broadband.

Finally uploaded the pictures.

From "Ja Ja Boo" to "Double U"

From “Cha cha” to “Achaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, Acha“.

From “fril fril” to “Give me some Curd“.

From “Tutta Tutta” to “Amma, I want eggs for breakfast and please don’t give me the yellow”.

From “I Lava OO” to “I Love you” (Now is more of – “I Love Akshay Kumar” and the subject is changing every week).

From “Trel trel” to “I like Wowie(chocolate bar).”

From “No Spanish” to “I understood what you just spoke in Hindi/Kannada/Tamil/Malayalam”.

From the first crawl, to the first steps, to the first bike ride.

From the first letters to the endless princess stories.

From the first gummy smiles, to the one toothed grins to the toothless wonder that you now are.

 

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The list is endless and we have savored every moment of it. Happy Birthday my little Princess! Achan wishes to be the only guy in your life for a LOOOOOOOOONG time and Amma wishes to have a jar that could hold every memory for you will soon fly away to build your own nest.

The legacy continues

Amma loved it. We used to crave for it as kids. I still can’t pass a vendor without putting my will power to the utmost test. I remember the stall being our usual Saturday evening “Hang Out” location. When I see a bunch of teenagers around a stall, it brings back a flood of old memories. 

Now DH is the hygiene conscious one, I’ve heard unending lectures on the dangers of eating from roadside vendors. I know he is right and have vowed many times to not eat from the stalls but I’ve always reneged on my resolution the minute I lay my eyes on the mouthwatering treat. I didn’t realize my occasional splurging was being constantly monitored by a pair of eyes that miss nothing. She begged for a bite and I relented and now her latest mantra is “I LOVE PANI PURI” or “I LOVE CORN”. I didn’t think she’d take to it because her tastes are similar to DHs and he hates it with a vengeance, but here she is begging for a treat.

What do I say, other than the legacy of the stall will continue and my little one may join the crowd of teenagers surrounding one in a few years.

 

Footnote: Before you decide to jump on me with the dangers of eating pani puri on the roadside, let me tell you that most stalls are trendier now. They use hygiene gloves and keep the pani/puri et al covered!

Baby’s Day Out – With Mom of course!

 

I’ve always planned special activities along with K when she was a baby. We’d do something special each week and I enjoyed every bit of it. Gymboree classes were fun and we loved it. Bubble baths were such fun, she’d splash away and nap time was easier later! We enjoyed story time at the library. We also loved the puppet shows and other activities there. She loved books and reading to her was always such fun. One activity that I looked forward to was a lunch of pancakes at IHOP every Thursday. It was fun and she dozed off in the car on our way back. Another fun activity was driving to the mall and playing in the play area and riding the carousel. We did that weekly. I enjoyed grocery shopping with her in the cart. Going out with her let me unwind and I began treasuring our weekly outings. Then she grew up and started school. I started work and it became increasingly difficult to plan outdoor activities with her. She had the Montessori and then activities that kept us busy through out though I still took her to her favourite restaurant for lunch once a month. Each month it was a different favourite, but we enjoyed it. It was always just me and her. I don’t remember when we stopped doing it completely but we started outings as a family and never did anything together, just me and her. I remember the last time we did out Chillis Lunch together, it was such fun and it was definitely last year… I did take her to the movies with friends in December but then we left and here we’ve always had company!

 

I really missed the alone time without realizing it. I missed taking care of her all by myself and the bonding we had at the time.  Then came teacher’s Day a Day off for K. Everyone else had work so it was just me and K. We could have lunched out but K is older now. I decided to take her shopping. It was fantastic. K loved spending time with me at the store and we visited every section. I finally found our special activity. I don’t think I’ll ever need another shopping companion again, well as long as K gets her shoes every time we go shopping. As she grows up and has other things in her life, more significant than our little outings, I can always treasure the memories of our small outing. I love my memories, I wish I could capture all on tape and play it back to DH sometimes!

All the paths I treaded on

In the journey of life we often encounter forks in our path. I’ve often wondered about the road not taken. What if I had gone for a Masters instead of starting work, what if I had continued working instead of staying home with K, what if……………….

I try to sum up all the crossroads in life and realize one important aspect of it all. My decisions have made me who I am today. All those roads not taken may have led me places that I might have wanted to go but where did the paths I chose lead me?  I got a wonderful year of work and freedom not going for a Masters when I wanted to. I’ll always cherish the year! I got three precious years with K staying at home with her. I would never trade my time with her for anything in the world. My life was enriched beyond words, thanks to the three years. Now, staying home again, waiting for her arrival from school, I often ponder about what would have happened had I not stayed for those three years. I’ve encountered countless cross roads in life and today for some reason am thinking about all the roads that I have taken. All those paths have made me a happy and content woman and have given me countless happy memories. I’m grateful for every single one of those memories and am glad for all the paths I took.

Why the block?

 A recent comment inspires me to post again. I’ve been writing off and on but have been putting off posting. The recent festive season gave me a lot of excuses for not posting. I’d almost forgotten how festive season feels in India.  The roads bear a festive look with vendors selling flowers/banana leaves and other odds and ends at every available nook and cranny. I just had to get out of the apt complex and there was everything I needed, all in one place. I love festive season in B’lore!

Starting with Ganesha Pooja, I have tried to celebrate every festival, for K’s benefit.

First it was Gowri/Ganesha pooja. Then we had Onam with ILs visiting us as well. It was fun. Navarathri Holidays meant I could go home but I really missed the Gollu display this year. Of course, the grand finale came with Diwali a couple of weeks back. The three of us enjoyed the festivities all over town. Diwali shopping was fun, I don’t remember the last time I did it but it definitely felt great! I had forgotten the sweets we exchanged with neighbours, the lamps we lit, the poojas Amma conducted and the payasams she made. I had all but forgotten the fun of the constant ringing phone with everyone calling us. With the constant excitement, I’ve all but forgotten to upload all my latest rambles!

Thank you SAJ for reminding me to post again!